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Squire Caw is a member of the Blackfeather Court. Though he tries hard to gain an elevation to knighthood, his intelligence leaves a lot to be desired. Ask him about his journey, though, and he will brag easily about how amazing he is.

Availability: Crown Store Sale

Cost: 2,500 Crowns

Obtained: Crown Store

Lines Spoken by This Houseguest:

• "Baron Jangleplume and the Peddler of Prizes tell me I need to practice more. Scratch! Parry! Flap! Thrust! Ha! No one performs their martial exercises like I do. Have a care with those fingers, featherless. My blood is up and I'm ready to peck!"
  
  
• "Being a squire is hard work. We polish our knights' talons, organize their piles of shinies... When I finally earn my knighthood, I'll treat my ward with nothing but respect. Until they step out of line. Then I'll really let them have it!"
  
  
• "The Blackfeather Court's Code of Chivalry demands that you give me five of your shiniest treasures, featherless. Demands! Why do you scowl? I don't make the rules. If you have a complaint, take it up with the Duke of Crows!"
  
  
• "The crows of Tamriel are a peculiar bunch. They just stare, and stare, and stare. Why do they not speak? Speak! I'm not sure what they're plotting, but the Blackfeather Court is not easily outwitted!"
  
  
• "Don't tell anyone I told you, but some members of the Blackfeather Court scheme to install you as our new ruler! Nothing will come of it, of course. Our Duke is far too clever. Even so ... don't get any ideas."
  
  
• "The Duke is a generous ruler, featherless. Generous and fair. When the Knight of Marrow drove off the dread Tabby Peaches, the Duke rewarded him with a pumpkin full of dead mice! One day I shall earn a feast for gallantry, just you watch!"
  
  
• "The Duke of Crows once told me, 'Squire Caw, you don't have the brains of an inbred vole.' I don't mean to speak ill of the Duke, but that's unfair! I brought him the brains of at least twenty voles. How am I supposed to know if they're inbred?"
  
  
• "Featherless battles are so uncivilized. Not like crow duels! Crow duels are courtly and dignified. My first duel featured a splendid display of crow manners. My foe was roosting quietly, so I snuck into his nest and pecked him to bits!"
  
  
• "The greatest knights have lords and ladies to woo. Woo! I tried to earn the affections of Lady Corngizzard, but she said she would only consider it if I was the last crow on Nirn. Do you suppose she wants me to murder everyone? Ambitious!"
  
  
• "Greetings, stork-legged giant! Yes, this nest is a fitting place for me to train. A crucible from which will rise Sir Caw -- Gallant Knight of Pinfeathers!"
  
  
• "I demand food, featherless! Carrion for feasting! Decaying flesh to savor and enjoy! Our proud Knight of Marrow once told me, 'Eat the entrails first. They dry the fastest.' I bet you don't even eat entrails! Feh! More for me!"
  
  
• "I have been practicing my rhetoric, featherless. All the greatest knights possess tongues of silver! Let us face off in a battle of words! Words! The viewpoint to discuss -- the superiority of crows above all creatures. Debate me at your own peril!"
  
  
• "I heard if you peck a horse's bum in just the right place, its head explodes. But I've pecked every bit of a horse's bum and all they do is buck and whinny. Any pointers? Exploding a horse's head would really do wonders for me at court."
  
  
• "I pity your lack of a beak, featherless. No weapon can match its glossy elegance! I can try to teach you to fight with that soft face of yours, but be prepared to lose an eye!"
  
  
• "The Knave of Rooks mentioned that you're a vassal of our great and powerful Duke of Crows. Splendid! As a trusted servant of the Duke, you could put a good word in for me, right? Help me get knighted? Do it, featherless, or I'll peck out your eyes!"
  
  
• "Knighthood isn't all silver-plucking and bat-slaying, you know. It's the high arts, too. Here, I'll recite a poem for you. 'Dead mice are sweet, silver is shiny. Fat-legged giants, they're foolish and whiny.' Sublime, isn't it? Sublime!"
  
  
• "No one minds me roosting here, do they? I think this place has a lot to teach me. Such as how best to bother someone. If I can annoy a hero of your stature, for example, harassing simple bumpkins should be as easy as plump-liver pie!"
  
  
• "Once, to show the Duke how worthy I was, I lifted a whole melond off the ground. A melon, featherless! I bet you have never seen a wingless squire lift an entire melon before!"
  
  
• "Only the proudest champions of the Blackfeather Court rise to knighthood. What I need is a quest. Yes! A grand adventure! What should I seek? An ogre's eye? A Hagraven's mole-hair? No, no, those won't do. Wait! I have it! A pewter spoon! Yes!"
  
  
• "Our exalted Duke of Crows would judge this place ... adequate. It needs more that glistens and gleams, featherless. Much more!"
  
  
• "That Peddler of Prizes! Says I should give up my dream of knighthood and commit to real crow-work. Says I should hoard carrion, hide silver, and harass stray cats. But no. No! I am called to a higher purpose! Villainous dogs and vile rats, beware!"
  
  
• "People call us Daedra! Can you imagine? Daedra ... feh. Like the Blackfeather Court has anything in common with that rabble! Do those ugly, toddler-sized Banekin have knights and ladies? I think not!"
  
  
• "The surest path to knighthood is the performance of great deeds. You are a doer of such deeds, correct? Maybe you can train me to kill a Dragon. How hard can it be? You wingless peasants do it all the time, right?"
  
  
• "This place is much better than Evergloam. Nocturnal's realm is full of weeping spirits. Always with the wailing and the sobbing and the sniffling! What do spirits have to cry about? Other than not being crows, I mean. Everyone should cry about that!"
  
  
• "Unflinching bravery? Yes. Svelte yet powerful physique? Check. Gentility befitting the Court? Absolutely! What else must a crow do to become a knight, featherless? Kill a bear, maybe? Find me a bear that I might slay it!"
  
  
• "What is that shiny thing your wobbling, fat-legged knights wear upon their heads? A helm, yes? Perhaps I just need one of those to become a knight. Yes! And the larger the better! Just think of how many rat carcasses I could fit in there!"
  
  
• "What? I'm not a thief! A true knight never steals. He simply takes things that don't belong to him to give them a more noble purpose. On an unrelated note, a mouse just scurried away with one of your items. I tried to stop him, honest!"
  
  
• "When you see Baron Jangleplume, tell him I want my tea saucer back. And my marble collection. He promises to keep things safe. Feh! Safe in his hoard of other people's treasures! He's pecking my marbles, featherless. I just know it!"
  
  
• "Wingless knights are clanky and slow. Slow! Knights of the Blackfeather Court are clever, strong, and swift! And also very hungry. Show me your fresh meats and tender cheeses, featherless!"
  
  
• "You need a squire. Just look at you! And I bet you gather your own carrion, too ... like a peasant! You can do better, featherless. Better!"
  
  
• "Your service to the Court is the stuff of legends! One day they will speak my name with such reverence. Squire Caw, the cat-slayer. Squire Caw, the hoard plunderer! Squire Caw, champion of quill and talon! Ha! Corn-farmers take heed. I am coming!"